Buggering about in bushes after midnight with a photographer conjures up all sorts of images, but last week it was all about the What Mountain Bike lights test.

As the final phase of months of testing we lug all 22 lights down the woods and try and find just the right mix of curving singletrack and peripheral light displaying shrubbery to satisfy our glass eyed master Russ. Then it's fumbling through blacked out bags, dropping connectors into long grass and generally giving apes a bad name till well after last orders to get all the lights fitted to the bike and tweaked to show off their brightest display. Some bright enough to create firework style oooohs and aaaaahs from me and Chris, some so dark you can barely see them in the shot. Think we'll put them into the commuting only category then.

Life isn't much less daft during daylight right now either. Mainstream manufacturers have either showed us all their new stuff at press camp or are waiting till Eurobike and Interbike to lift the lid. Either way we can't get hold of most of it for testing for months to come.

Nothing else to do but go out and see exactly how many feet the nettles have grown since the last thunderstorm then. Reckon that new cheeky trail up to the pylon will definitely be impassable by now.

There are some great things about summer: Long days, dry, fast trails, a cold beer when you get back. But there are also some irritating bits. Nettles, wasps and all the hikers and horse riders who suddenly appear when it's sunny and clog up the trails.

Now for the most part the trail centres aren't so bad - although you'll always get some eejit shouting at you for being on a recently built MTB only trail they claim has been a footpath since Tom Jones sang Delilah. Some centres have shared sections where you're likely to meet two legged and four legged obstacles on the trail. Then of course there's all the bridleway networks across the rest of Wales where hoss and hiker are free to wander, set up picnics or leave steaming piles of poo. They always seem to manage to be in the worst possible place round a blind downhill corner or at the start of the sweet singletrack descent you've sweated an hour to earn.

Now I don't want to sound like Uncle Bryn here, but however much of a pain in the saddle they're being, a little diplomacy goes a long way. After much experimentation we've found a long whistle (ideally with a rise and fall tone like a bosuns whistle on a boat or Star Trek) is far better for getting noticed without spooking people than a shout, or a cough or a brake squeal. For a start you can start it way back and keep it going until they notice. rather than a shout/bell whatever which they never notice if you do it far enough away and then panic and get offended if you do it too close.

Admittedly we've not tried a Vuvuzela yet, but we'd rather keep both hands on our bars while trying to brake towards a deaf dog and owner.

Once you've got their attention remember that they've basically walked or trotted into a kind of countryside coma, so keep all sentences and greetings short, friendly and easily understood. "Bike on the left/right please, what a lovely horse/dog/walking stick/day etc, three more riders behind." then go normally works for us.

To be honest you're always going to meet some cretins determined to have a fight over your right to be there, but as long as you are riding legally, just explain that you've a perfect right to be there and leave. You'll never convince them otherwise however irate you get, and you'll be miles away from their seething impotence in a matter of minutes anyway.

Don't forget to be nice to other riders too. We've all started somewhere and while some wobbler in the middle of a singletrack descent is a real pain, don't crowd them, carve them up or push past when you're likely to make them crash. You wouldn't have liked it when you started and they've got as much right to be there as you. If you can stop and wait till they've cleared the section do it, but otherwise just ask them to let you past when they get a chance to pull over safely.

Damn, I did end up sounding exactly somebodies dad there. Ah well, play nicely out there children and I'll be back with something more interesting soon I promise.

 

 

 

Right forgive me for being a dad here, but the best thing about this weekend has been watching my two girls get out onto the dry singletrack and get some stuff nailed that's been too sticky for ages. We started off with a few wobbles and back of the saddle dad braking (Freya is only 5) but after an hour or so they're picking lines and standing up over the bumps like they've been doing it for years.

So if you get the chance to get home early, or skive a day don't just grab your bike but get your running shoes on and get the nippers out instead. Whether it's the park, local trails or a proper trail centre trip (from experience a blue or green route is a great way to give them that "proper bike rider" buzz) it's a fantastic way to kick start their biking enthusiasm for the summer. Just make sure they know beforehand which is the front brake and which is the back one. That'd be another experience talking moment my wife won't let me forget in a hurry.......

 

 

I've actually caught it this year. No not swine flu, the start of the season. The thing that normally flies past me before I've even had a chance to chuck a few interval sprints into the riding mix. The great post Christmas intentions of races to do coming unstuck when it turns out half those events have already been and gone. Thanks to the frozen trails and a dog who demands an hour of singletrack every morning though, I'm all tuned up and ready to go before the first CRC marathon has sent it's eager hordes into the hills. Still with events like the Dyfi Enduro filling up in a couple of days you'll still need to get your skates on to make sure there's a place left in your chosen event. Which means we really ought to get that events calendar sorted shouldn't we. Well "shouldn't I" really, it's nobody elses fault but mine. That's what happens when you actually get ahead with your riding.

I'm sure there was going to be a load of stuff in this blog about charity rides, new kit, a full Welsh issue of MBUK magazine and the lambs in the local pub peeing on Jonty's Camelbak bite valve as well, but apparently these things only work if you stick to some sort of single point and have some sort of structure rather than writing from the hip. Well the events bit came out OK, I'll just have to work on the rest. Not before another smooth, dry snowdrop lined, springtime singletrack session though. With Tilly the Spaniel obviously!

 

Guy

 

 

It started this week. Whoever it is that controls the daily disco soundtrack slotted in the disc marked "Dawn chorus: assorted feathery vocalists" and pressed play. That means spring is coming.

Considering that the snow came down so hard and then thawed so fast the trails are actually remarkably dry. OK the moor tops are still bottomless bog and slush, with 3 feet of die hard snow in some places as we found out last night, but the local singletrack is actually firmer and faster than it was for most of last summer. That means the trees and plants are working up a thirst and drinking all the thaw water. That means spring is coming.

There's easter eggs in the shops and creme eggs on the telly. That means spring is coming.

So snow flurries and whatever else the weather might have in store this weekend be damned. That's three counts and out for winter 2010. I know cos a little bird told me.